Balance Trilogy: Balance for the Mind
Written by Larissa
What is a Balanced Mind?
Balance means “an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain upright and steady.” (Oxford English Dictionary) This can mean in a building, in nature, in a human body – physically, mentally, in relationships, etc. An “even distribution” of anything is almost impossible in all human situations, so let’s actually begin with a different word, equanimity.
The word equanimity is often used interchangeably with balance. Though they are similar, we’re missing the root, the original purpose, and the felt sense of the word equanimity. The Latin root of the word is:
aequanimitās, from aequus = equal, level, even
& animus = mind, body, spirit
The original meaning was to remain calm and composed, especially under pressure. It also meant even-tempered and fair.
Because the root means “even across mind, body, and spirit”, it’s important we consider that a balanced, even mind also requires us to allow our body and spirit to weigh in. The second, often missed part of balance or equanimity is fairness. For fairness to occur, we need the proper response to the moment, which is not always calm. We might NOT always be calm, cool, and collected*, and that is okay. In our blog last month, we looked at this more in depth.
The true meaning of equanimity and balance is that we’ve done the work for our mind, body, and spirit/heart to connect and stabilize. Then, we have a clear understanding of who we are. It means we have a steadiness to return to. It means we do the work outside of stressful moments, so when stress occurs, we have a stable landing pad instead of a roiling sea that our stress gets tossed back into.
A Balanced Mind is knowing yourself.
And knowing what brings you back to your own steadiness.
Finding a balanced mind requires awareness, tenderness, and a desire or allowance for change to occur. It means recognizing that our fair responses might not always be calm, and yet, we know how to find our calm in the storm. Wise balance might mean the boat is rocking, and we need to move our bodies, minds, and hearts, in accordance with slowly steadying the rocking.
How do you get better at returning to Equanimity?
Practice. Practice, practice, and practice. And practice before you are in a moment of stress. (Meditation; it is the perfect place for this practice!) Under stress, we hope to rise to the occasion, but we will inevitably fall to our level of practice. If your default mechanisms are things like avoiding the hard conversations, seeking blame, stuffing down your needs, this is exactly where you’ll land next time you’re stressed. The good news is that we can change these default mechanisms!
Right now, try this out:
✦ Think about the last time you were stressed (try to pick something small, think of an annoyance rather than devastation.
✦ What did you do? How did you react or respond? Where can you feel this in your body? Did anything tighten up? How’s your breathing?
✦ Now place a hand on your chest, and say to your body, “Thank you for showing me this response.”
✦ Take a deep breath and let the story go. Just notice your breath. If your mind keeps going back to the story, thank your mind, and return to your breath.
✦ Do you feel even the tiniest bit more stable or connected to the present moment?
Equanimity and Balance:
Once we practice bringing together our mind, body, and spirit, we can then start to find true balance – “an even distribution of weight/stress enabling you to remain upright”. We could all use a little stabilizing to remain upright within our many responsibilities in this sweet, hard, wild little life <3
Feeling your body, letting the story go, and cultivating awareness of sensations are all part of a Balanced Mind, and we’ll practice these tools throughout the month. We’ll also work with tools like thought labeling (proven to reduce emotional reactivity), skillful self-compassion, and mantras to support your overall well-being, including working on balancing your mind.
Join us for community, resourcing, and a little daily balance. We gather at 7:30am EST, always free. You can also find us on Insight Timer, a free app you can use on the go, anytime. We’d love to breathe with you.
